Through the Valley of Grief and Pain

This week a good friend of mine died. The loss is so deep, especially when you think of the faces of his little daughters and much-loved partner. I have known the depths of physical pain in my time, but the agony of grief is right up there with the worst. Malcolm Duncan, in his book Good Grief; Living with Sorrow and Loss, tells of his own devastation following the death of his father. He literally collapsed onto the ramp of a ferry between Belfast and England when returning from the funeral. Yet, his book is one of hope, comfort and encouragement in the midst of loss.

Walking through the valley of pain and grief can be a devastating experience. Through my own story, both as a sufferer of chronic pain but also as a pastor and counsellor, I have been in that valley too often. I recommend Malcolm's book, but also his faith. It carried him through and trusting in God's promises to be with us in this particular valley has really helped me also.

Psalm 23 says; 'Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me' (ESV). Notice the word 'through' - this valley is not a stopping place. Grief is a journey and it is one that we don't have to make alone. The risen Lord Jesus is with us in that valley and beyond. He has overcome death and offers everlasting life to all who trust in him. And he sent his followers the Holy Spirit, whom Jesus described as a comforter (or possibly counsellor). Maybe these are the 'rod and staff' referred to by the writer of the famous Psalm.

You don't have to walk through your own valley alone either. He's only a prayer away, and sometimes the very darkness of grief and loss serves to help us be aware of our own need. King David could say 'The Lord is my shepherd' because he had chosen to come under his care. That choice is still ours to make today.