I came across a remarkable verse or two in Isaiah 50 this morning. It took my breath away. Standing in front of the mirror of God's Word I felt exposed and vulnerable. I decided to do something about it. I want to be a doer and not only a hearer of what God says. Here's what it says:
'Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the word of his servant? Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God. But now, all you who light fires and provide yourselves with flaming torches, go, walk in the light of your fires and of the torches you have set ablaze. This is what you shall receive from my hand: You will lie down in torment.'
What really bothered me about the passage (Is 50:9-10) was when I read again in the Amplified Version:
'Who is among you who
fears the Lord, who obeys the voice of His Servant, yet who walks in darkness and deep trouble and has no shining splendour ? Let him rely on, trust in, and be confident in the name of the Lord, and let him lean upon and be supported by his God. Behold, all you who attempt to kindle your own fires , who surround and gird yourselves with momentary sparks, darts, and firebrands that you set aflame!—walk by the light of your self-made fire and of the sparks that you have kindled ! But this shall you have from My hand: you shall lie down in grief and in torment.'
I saw the light! My own 'self-made fires' are just so inadequate to light up my path. In the darkness of my current situation - and it is very dark - the advice from God's Word is to 'rely on, trust in, and be confident in the name of the Lord'. Now that's quite a challenge. I am guilty of lighting my own lamps and setting my own torches in place all the time, and they simply will not do. I need to exchange my flickering flames for the blaze of His words if I going to find out His ways. And I don't want to 'lie down in grief and torment' either - I've had quite enough of that already thank you very much.
So, you guessed it. I've made up my mind once again to go God's way and to wait for Him not to try and organise my own future. And with that - I sent off a few emails!