That's a Relief!

At last - a few days of pain relief after months of the most appalling pancreatic agony!  Diane and I travelled last week to University College London Hospital for a procedure called a 'coeliac plexus block' which is done under heavy sedation in the endoscopy unit there. A large amount of steroids and narcotics are injected directly into a bundle of nerves right near the pancreas in an attempt to interrupt the pain - and voila - a pain free Easter pour moi!

Years ago I had a series of six such blocks and they gave me varying degrees of effect, ranging from nothing at all (twice) to six weeks of glorious freedom. I don't know how long this one will last, but it is such a pleasure to experience life like so many do without the nerve tearing, burning, intensity of pancreatic pain.

In all these 18 years of battling this condition we have found it essential to take hold of something someone reminded us of in church this morning. Jenny stood at the front of the building and said that she has come to understand, through her many years of sorrow and struggle in different ways to mine, that our sufferings are there for a reason. 'They are', she said, 'allowed by God so as to make us more Christ-like'. Now I wish that God had other ways to make more Christ-like - in fact I'll bet Jesus Himself would have preferred other methods to that when he heaved the cross to his shoulder that first Easter, but he knew I needed him so he went to an unimaginable place of pain for me (and for you).

Jenny was right.  The bible actually says so. There may be many other reasons why we battle, some our own fault and some the fault of others, but God has not finished with us yet and we need to trust him even when we cannot trace his ways.

Meanwhile I'll just be grateful for a few days off and pray it lasts a long long time!

Walking by Faith

As you can imagine from this photo we are really besotted with our tiny Pomeranian dog - Paprika! She weighs only 2kg but has a much bigger personality than that. In fact she seems quite convinced that she is in charge of our home and that anyone entering it should obtain her permission first!  That can cause just a little stress to folk visiting the Pastor. Paprika is 11 now and in doggy years that makes her well up in her seventies in human equivalent years, so she is an old lady (only don't you dare say that within her earshot).

Recently this adorable little friend suffered a slipped disc in her neck - the week after I cancelled her pet insurance because the premium was becoming too high!  When I asked the vet how long we might have to keep bringing her back for injections she mumbled something about it being until her extension is paid off! Seriously though, the really sad part about this is to see our dear dog struggling to walk and even stand.  The messages are just not getting through to her legs from her head. She has good days and bad days but when things are really poor we have to hold her up to eat and do other necessary things.

We don't know how this will go but are resigned to the fact that we won't have our darling doggy much longer, as Pomeranians don't usually live as long as some breeds anyway. I have thought a lot about her condition and I feel there is a lesson for me in her dilemma.  The Bible teaches that Christ is our head - the head of the body which is his church (1 Corinthians 12) and that we need to be in clear contact with him if we are to be able to walk the path of faith in this life.  Thankfully when we do struggle and fall heavenly hands are there to lift us and hold us up, but God's best for us is to hear the commands of Christ clearly and follow them.  In this, then, as in nature, we walk by good communication with the head.

And I'm still praying that Paprika will improve too.  After all, if it matters to me then it matters to God!