Is This the End of the Road?

 

Walking through a leafy lane near my home recently I marvelled at the thick covering of Autumn leaves on the ground around me. It seemed like walking on a luxurious carpet of gloriously coloured threads and felt like crunching my way across snow. No wonder our Trans-Atlantic cousins call this time of the year the Fall as the trees let go of their fabulously shaped and shaded appendages. The chill in the air took nothing away from the sense of wonder at the overflowing generosity of this season - sending an abundance of leaves my way as if a crowd of unseen footmen were strewing my path with their hilariously embroidered cloaks!

In the last few weeks I have turned 70 years of age, celebrated our Golden Wedding (50 years) anniversary with Diane, and retired (again) from being in active ministry as an Associate Pastor at my local church. It is, for me at least, a bit like Autumn has finally come in my life, and Winter will not be far behind. There is a sense of loss as leaves fall from my tree too! Folk make kind comments about the new season ahead, but there is no escaping certain mellow emotions at the passing of yet another phase of activity and usefulness.

I have found help and encouragement from a recent study of St Paul's last letter, 2 Timothy, written from prison before his final execution at Rome. It seems so unfair that this great servant of God should be so reduced and, in his case, maltreated. He has been falsely accused of wrongdoing, deserted by virtually all the Christians he knew (1:15, 4:16, 4:9-10), even betrayed by one in particular (4:14). His sufferings were no doubt part of the emperor Nero's persecution of Christians in 64AD. Yet Paul, despite being in the Autumn of his life and ministry, manages to keep his spirit clean. How?

• He was grateful for the little he did have, and for the small group of folk who were helping him (1:16, 4:11-12). In this Autumn season I also need to let gratitude be my attitude.
• He soaked himself in the Scriptures! Paul asks Timothy to bring him his 'scrolls and parchments' (3:16, 4:13). Paul's reading of the Bible was not something he did only to preach from. He lived in God's words to him in every season.
• He focussed on the future. He tells Timothy about that - 'Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day – and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing' (2 Tim 4:8).
• He entrusted his concerns to God. In 2 Tim. 1:12 he says that he is believing God and is convinced that he is able to guard what he has entrusted to him until that day. I have concerns too, maybe you have also, and there's a lesson for us here.
• He gave himself to mentorring others. Timothy was his special project, and Paul gave himself to writing letters and receiving occasional visits from him. He was restricted but not cancelled! The great man had really moved into a new season.
  

As I walked through my leafy lane, I realised that these trees were doing something vital in their Autumn shedding. They were laying down the seed-bed for the next generation of seedlings and supplying the mulch for their safety and development. The shedding was not 'loss' in nature's mind - but gain! Maybe that's why she celebrates the act with all those amazing colours.

So, I am not going to deny my age, sweeping away the leaves contemptuously as if they simply should not be falling, but rather engage with God's plan for this next season with the excitement and joy that comes from the certainty that this is not the end of the road, but simply a bend in the road, that leads me on in God's wonderful purpose for my life.